Unbearable Suffering: My Battle With the Enigmatic Suffering of Cluster Headaches

It began on a overcast weekday in the morning in September 2016. I was working as a teacher, attempting to manage a new class, when a intense pain sprang behind my right eye. This was followed by rapid stabs, reminiscent of lightning bolts. As the school day progressed, the discomfort eased and then returned with greater force. Four times that day I handed over a colleague with worksheets and hurried to the staff bathroom to douse my face with cold water. I tried paracetamol, but the pain remained unrelenting.

The attacks appeared repeatedly that autumn, and once more in the spring, soon establishing an yearly pattern. September and October were the worst, then February and March. I could predict the routine: a warning sensation in the shower, early twinges on the train, full-on pain in class by 9.30am. In 2019, a doctor eventually referred me to a specialist and I was given a diagnosis with cluster headache disorder.

Cluster headaches typically begin with severe pain behind a single eye that persists up to several hours.

About one in 1,000 individuals suffer by the disorder, and men are more frequently affected. Attacks usually start with sudden, excruciating agony focused on a single eye that peaks within minutes and continues for up to three hours. Episodes come in clusters, daily or several times a day, and are associated with tearing eyes, sagging eyelids or facial perspiration. There exists the episodic form, which occurs in seasonal bouts; some patients have chronic cluster headaches, characterized by the absence of extended pain-free periods.

What unites patients is the severity. One study rated the sensation at 9.7 10, more severe than broken bones or pancreatitis. A separate discovered 64% of cluster headache patients reported thoughts of self-harm amid bouts; the number dropped to 4% when they were not in pain.

One patient, 74, a chronic sufferer from Pembrokeshire, isn't surprised. Her attacks started when she was two. “I would throw myself on the ground and bang my head. That was put down to being spoiled,” she says. Her condition worsened through childhood. Drinking in her teens, similar to several triggers, made things worse. After having sherry at her graduation party, she remembers hardly being able to see on the transport home.

Her relatives often interpreted her episodes as intoxicated episodes. Support eventually came from her father and then from her husband, her spouse. “I was very lucky to find such an understanding person,” she says. Hobbs found clerical work after relocating, but often hid her illness. She was dismissed from one job, in part due to absences during attacks. Her breakthrough diagnosis came in the early 2000s at a national neurology center.

Still, the failure to organize daily activities around unpredictable pain took its toll. She especially hated being unable to plan social events, being seen as unreliable as a colleague, and even having to be cared for by her children during the incapacitation caused by the most severe episodes. “It steals from you of the simple liberties we don't appreciate until they're gone,” she says. She remembers winning tickets for a significant concert, only to have an episode inside a portable toilet.


Headaches have been described across history. “The earliest description of headache comes by way of the Mesopotamians in 4000BC,” write authors in a book on the topic. They attributed the disease to an evil spirit who attacked his victims' heads.

Ancient medical records suggest bizarre remedies for what some observers would classify as a headache disorder. In the medieval times, severe headache was identified as a separate disorder, with treatments including bloodletting to other, more folk remedies.

It was a European physician who provided the initial comprehensive account of a cluster-type attack. In his medical observations, he describes a patient “afflicted with a very intense headache happening and disappearing daily at fixed hours”.

The disorder were only formally classified by international medical societies in 1988. From the 1960s to the 1990s, they were thought to be caused by a issue with a key blood vessel which delivers blood to the brain. Prominent experts in diagnosing the condition explain this.

In 1998, scientists published the results of a research project for which they had induced attacks in patients and monitored the attacks in a imaging machine. The results, featured in a prominent journal, showed activation of the a brain region, which is responsible for human circadian rhythm, when patients were in discomfort, and a deactivation when they felt better.

In spite of such progress, identification remains slow. Jamie Charteris's symptoms began in the 1980s and felt like “a modelling balloon being inflated behind my left eye”. Doctors thought he had sinus problems; he had four operations before finally being diagnosed in recently, after a doctor looked up his symptoms.

Neurologists say wait times in diagnosis and managing occur because patients are rarely seen during an episode. “You're tired and low, but not in severe pain,” one says. He works by ruling out other common head pain disorders, such as tension-type headache, before confirming the disorder. A thorough history is essential: on which side do signs occur? For how long? What season? Are there triggers, such as alcohol? Certain characteristics such as redness, sagging eyelids and stuffy nose help confirm cluster headaches. Once identified, patients may be sent to specialist centers. But a lot of first go to emergency rooms or are given unsuitable treatments.

Dorothy Chapman, 78, has suffered from the condition for most of her life, although she hasn't had an attack since recent years. When she was in her 20s, she had her molars extracted because dental professionals misinterpreted her symptoms. She believes dentists still need greater awareness. When another patient sought help from a charity, it was she who replied. The author recalls calling a helpline during an attack in early 2021; a calm advisor talked me through oxygen treatment and drugs until the episode eased.

National guidance on treatment recommend that sufferers are offered high-flow oxygen and/or a specific medication administered by nasal spray. No oral painkillers or opioids should be used. Prophylactic options include verapamil, which apparently helps manage the bouts of some people.

But consultant specialists argue the official guidelines need updating to reflect a more defined treatment pathway and help general practitioners avoid incorrect prescriptions. For periodic patients, the treatment window is critical: “The duration of the bout determines the approach.” Short cycles with occasional episodes are managed with acute therapy only. Longer or more intense periods require preventative medications such as verapamil, sometimes paired with steroids. Many patients also receive a greater occipital nerve block during a cycle – an procedure into the area of the skull where the pain is that reduces nerve activity.

The national guidance need updating to reflect a
Stephanie Miller
Stephanie Miller

A seasoned gaming analyst with over a decade of experience in online casinos, specializing in slot game mechanics and player strategies.